Skip to main content

Is it wrong to tell kids that their future is limitless?


So many of us tell our kids “you can be anything you want to be when you grow up”.  But can they?

The first time I told my daughter she had limits was during the naming of Catholic Pope Francis in 2013.  She was 8 and asked if she could be Pope one day.  I told her females are not allowed to be head of the Catholic Church.  I answered her “why” with my own bias; “because some people think tradition is more important than equality”. 

I’ve watched businesses, young parents, grandparents all decide what toys are for girls and which for boys.  I guess girls don’t grow up to drive cars or build buildings.  Perhaps men don’t become Fathers or caregivers.  If that is true, it is a waste of time for girls to play with cars or blocks or for boys to like dolls.  We tell them they can be ANYTHING when they grow up, yet we limit their play as children.  

If their future is limitless, why don’t we limit our children less?

We teach our kids to be kind to all people.  Not to be a bully and to stand up for others being bullied.  And then we have a passionate exchange as adults, like a political election, and tolerate candidates spewing hate, bigotry and publicly bullying other candidates.  We don’t want our kids to support mean behavior or bullies and yet we vote for a candidate anyway, because a portion of their campaign serves our own self-interest.  In that decision we tell our kids that there ARE things that are more important than being a good human.

We have a rise of youth mental illness and suicide in North America.  I wonder how much of the responsibility for this crisis falls on the adults for setting unrealistic expectations and sending mixed messages.

Is society too broken to fulfill the dreams of our children?


What’s your view?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Terror Can’t Live in a House of Love

As with 9/11, this last week weighs heavily on so many of us.  Obviously all of the ISIS attacks and the humans lost, families mourning are top of mind.  Each day my heart gets heavier when hate and rhetoric spew from people in my own circles, out of what I believe can only be mishandled fear. I have actively and passionately thrown facts and love in the face of each hurl of bigotry and ignorance I witness.  I believe we can neutralize negativity with extreme light and love.  Yet in the wake of these efforts remains a lingering disappointment for some of the people I have respected and cared about throughout my life.  I won’t be quiet to sidestep conflict any longer.  I won’t accept excuses of age, fear and statements like “people don’t change – no point in arguing”. There is a HUGE point to argue. Terrorists rely on fear, divisiveness and hate to facilitate their goals. Terror can’t live in a house of love.    I refuse to...

What do you do?

Preparing for my participation in the Refresh 2013 event, I kept thinking about the pivotal time in my life when a series of events forced me to refresh my goals and self image.  This story of my reinvention adventure was published in Chicken Soup, Finding Your Happiness .    What Do You Do? by Sheri Gammon Dewling “We think she has pneumonia again – you need to come get her,” said the Daycare provider who was caring for my eighteen month old daughter.   “I’m on my way, “I assured her and turned back to my computer screen.   Staring back at me was an incomplete sales proposal I was preparing for an upcoming pitch.   My first thought was, “come on ... how am I going to get this proposal done in time”. I got in the car and tears rolled down my face when I realised how wrong I was.   My baby was sick again and she needed me.   It was the second time she had pneumonia in two months, after six months of ear infections, high fevers and a per...

Depression Lies

Depression lies to us about who we are.   It tricks us into believing negative self-talk, and then tries to make us too tired to fight back.   It makes our bodies ache to discourage the physical activity that would create endorphins so needed to quiet the negative noise.   Depression may tell us to either starve or over-feed our bodies, both attempts to skew our self-image. Depression lies to us, and sometimes we listen. I know depression.   I used to be afraid to admit our acquaintance.   In my 20s it would visit infrequently.     I called it something else until I met it more often and our relationship grew. In my early 30s it was called S.A.D. (Seasonal Affected Disorder).   Turns out my body likes sunshine.   Once I left my retail travel career with 4 Caribbean jaunts each winter, my Doctor noticed a pattern of symptoms and a subsequent treatment plan was initiated.   In my late 30s we became intimately acquainted, after ea...